*Warning. If you’re easily offended, stop here.
So my son and (almost) daughter-in-law (six more days!) have a cat named Rothko. He’s an aloof cat, even by cat standards, and most of the pictures that I see of him put me in mind of W.C. Fields.
Rothko has had some urinary troubles lately. Daniel called the vet and asked if they could take a look at him. They said yes, and told him that it would be $55. He took Rothko in, and they decided to keep him for a few hours for observation. Daniel asked if it would cost any more money and was assured that it wouldn’t. Several hours later, they called and told him to come get his cat…and that it would be $200.
Daniel picked up the cat and took him home. Since Rothko was still having trouble going to the bathroom due to a blockage, he was instructed to purchase special cat food, (to the tune of $25 for a four pound bag) and advised that sometimes immersing the cat in warm water helps dissolve the stones. After buying the food, he decided to give the cat a bath.
Rachael was in Chicago and could not help him. Usually, giving Rothko a bath involves a lot of high pitched screaming…and the cat hates it too. Daniel said that generally the only way to fully immerse him is to hug him to his chest and roll over in the water with him.
Since Rachael wasn’t there, he decided to bathe him in the kitchen sink, for more control. He ran the water, got it nice and warm, and picked up the cat. Rothko immediately began screaming bloody murder, and as soon as Daniel dunked him, he shot straight up over his head.
The back half of the cat was now soaking wet, and to avoid having him get water everywhere, Daniel made a desperate grab for him. He caught him by the back half, and accidentally poked both thumbs into his bladder region. He heard a “POP” and Rothko began peeing…straight into Daniel’s mouth.
Rothko hasn’t had a problem since.